The
subtitle entertains the implication that we do not actually live in a
democracy. Yes, if eligible, British citizens are allowed to vote for whom they
want to be in control of our government. Yes, there are different political
parties out there, each of them offering us normal citizens what they think is
good for the nation. Well, that is the impression one gets when listening to
politicians speak and make promises, yet for the better part of their time in
office, these promises are seldom delivered. Sir Winston Churchill, when asked
what qualities a good politician needs, rightly observed: “the ability to
predict what will happen tomorrow, next month and next year. And the ability to
explain afterwards why it didn’t happen.” But, as you will see, there’s more to
it than a simple ‘democracy.’
A
democracy does not quite describe our governmental system and many other ones
at that. From 1858 until today, all of our Prime Ministers received a
first-class education, attending Eton or Harrow (if not the ‘lower’ public
schools) then continuing to Oxford or Cambridge. More often than not, our Prime
Ministers were from prominent, well-to-do families with a plethora of
connections meaning that their climb to the top was not as strenuous as they
would have had us believe. We have even been graced with aristocracy, such as
our first Prime Minister, Viscount Palmerston, and more recently, the Marquis
of Salisbury and the Earl of Rosebery (1886, 1895 and 1894 respectively). Each
time a new Prime Minister comes into office, control and power doesn’t change
hands from, say Liberals to Conservatives, but rather from one rich person to
another. Power has always been kept in that one group of people; the Elite. Our
politicians were and still are aware of this and so they had to employ various
methods to keep us normal citizens ‘distracted, so to speak. Enter The Media.
Using the media, politicians have managed to keep some of us sated and out of
the real System. Look at football for example. The most popular sport in the
world, football was actually endorsed, encouraged, supported and funded by
politicians in its early days. Its potential as a mass distraction was
obscenely obvious, and our statesmen capitalised on that. Observe how millions
of people flock to watch 22 men in shorts exhaust themselves kicking a ball
back and forth.
I
think it prudent to mention at this point that, despite my arguments, I am a
keen footballer, having once played for various football clubs, including a
brief sojourn with Arsenal’s Junior Gunners. Fortunately, I am one of the few
who can enjoy the sport but also see it for what its real purpose is: a
distraction.
There
is nigh on nothing useful on television; each year, more and more of these ‘reality’
programmes are produced, rendering people addicted to what the Spaniards
rightly call La Caja Tonta (The Stupid Box). Personally, I cannot see what
shows such as “The Only Way Is Essex” and “Made in Chelsea” are doing on
television. What is so fascinating about cretinous youths indulging in their
self-importance and revealing their dirty linen to the public? Yet, it is precisely these shows that are
responsible for keeping the majority of the British population out of the
political system. And you were calling it a Democracy? Yes, on paper,
technically we live in a democracy but the creed of every politician is: Keep
people distracted with worthless television and they will not be able to see
that what we are really doing is comparing apples with oranges.
Even
the News has lost its seriousness. I am sure you will have noticed how news
reporters suffer from the ‘And Now In Other News’ syndrome. Let me explain. You
may have a serious news broadcast about, say a double murder following violent
rape. The news reporter will manage to wear a sombre countenance throughout the
report. Then the facade drops as a big smile dawns on her face and she says,
“and now in other news, a dog with pink fur and a glass eye has been the first
of its kind to swim 100 meters...” or words to that effect. It’s as though the
murders never happened. Even the news has become entertainment.
The
existence of the various political parties helps to maintain the illusion that
we have the option of electing different politics...to some extent. Yes, two
Conservative leaders will say more or less the same thing, though years apart.
Likewise with two Labour leaders and two Liberal Democrat leaders. They do have
differing political ideologies, do not get me wrong there. They do want to obtain
power in order to apply their policies. I’m not suggesting that there is a
great conspiracy between politicians involving trading power between
upper-class chums. What I am saying, nay asking, is why does our
political system so resembles a plutocracy? To all intents and purposes, we
live in an Elitocracy. Yes, I did just coin that. That seems to capture
perfectly our political system. Modern politics is simply a platform on which
hedonists attempt to deceive the people.
I
realise that my points seem to depict me as an anti-citizen and even, forgive
my blasphemy, a communist. No, no, no, dear Lord! Although, the idea of
a communist system is very, very good. Equality for all? Great!... Communism
will never work though. Here’s why. In every society, there will always be at
least one person with ambition. This ambition will cause said person to want to
do more than just ‘go with the flow.’ Thus, the ambitious person is the most
likely to begin something new, with him/her having a prominent, if not leading,
role. A communist system cannot accommodate people with ambition for this
reason; it goes against the Communist Grain.
On a final note, my idea of the perfect political
system would be one that borrows elements from communism and a Pantisocracy.
Then, every year, a vote is held where the citizens put forward the name of the
person whom they think is the most influential. This person is then exiled.